Courtesy of brilliant reader “Guest” there’s some evidence that the cover image for this book…bears an awfully strong resemblance to a drawing of Poison Ivy by John Tyler Christopher. Take a look:

It’s kind’ve a sketchy area, legally speaking, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable selling a book that had an image that was THAT close to someone else’s copyrighted work.


Judah pokes his head in to where Harlow is lying in bed. She’s a 187 Zapatos old, meaning she’s 276 earth-years old. Wow. It took Judah 250 years to get around to visiting his mom? What a dick.

I never favored that ridiculous standard time (loc. 4323).

You and me both, Judah.

He explains that when he and Rourry satisfy the means of their destiny they’ll let themselves die. I wonder if Rourry is supposed to be a nickname, or if Judah still can’t pronounce her name properly, and what, exactly, Judah and Rourry’s destiny is supposed to be. I’m guessing she’s teasing the inevitable sequel.

Judah says goodbye and leaves, without asking what she’s been up to, or how she’s doing, or giving her a hug, or really anything.

The All Knowing:

Only one of the moons survived the war. Hmmm. You’d think a war destructive enough to wipe out two moons would also be destructive enough to wipe out every living thing on the planet. It would certainly fuck with the ecosystem. Maybe this is what killed the dinosaurs?

The Hell Gates could still be opened someday. Though Avery-Oliver, long passed, whose lingering soul has been whipped away from the face of the new earth, it is not to say that he may return again in some form (loc. 4336).

They should’ve thrown the Ring into Orodruin. Then nuked the site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

We learn that everyone spread out into nomadic tribes and each of them repeated their own stories of what happened.

The most important thing was, that no one rememberd [sic] the cruel horrible world that the earth was before Harlow, and Jafar, on that one faithful day, met by chance and at first glance, changed the fate of the world (loc. 4342).

Thus ensuring that by not remembering history they were doomed to repeat it and continue doing unspeakably cruel things to each other for all of recorded humanity. Also, I love that subtle way the title was thrown in there. Remember that time when at first glance Jafar noticed an attractive peasant girl and decided to forcibly marry and rape her?

Apparently, Harlow was born in the part of the world that is now “southern Russia” which really narrows it down. And Yelle Yaxle is the reason for the Bermuda triangle for reasons that are boring and I don’t care about.

Everyone goes off and live their life more or less content, but all of them have a feeling inside:

It was a sad and morbid thought, but each one felt the same. “I Am Still Hollow.” (loc. 4353)

Then there’s a quote:

“I have found that hollow, which even I had relied on for solid.” —Henry David Thoreau (loc. 4367)

It feels remarkably out of place for the book I’ve just finished, which, by extension, makes it feel perfectly in place, because nothing about this book makes sense.

And that’s that. The end of the book, minus several pages of vocabulary which I’m not going to even touch.

I have to say, after having written over twenty-seven thousands words about this book, I still don’t really know what it’s about. If I had to summarize it, it would probably go something like this:

“There are some characters who make poor choices and aren’t very nice to each other. A bad guy sort’ve shows up and they defeat him.”

That seems accurate.

Drinks: 16

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  1. swenson on 23 May 2014, 22:03 said:

    Your summary aligns much with mine, although I would throw in “but magic and time travel” as well.

    I would say this has been good, but that might be untrue. It has been interesting, certainly.

  2. sanguine on 24 May 2014, 01:18 said:

    Great spork. It’s interesting to see a horrendously confusing narrative like this torn apart. At least the Maradonia Saga kept things somewhat under control so that I could understand what the hell was even happening, though I certainly don’t disrespect Breeanna like I disrespect Tesch. I’m excited to see what you’ll be sporking next!

  3. The Smith of Lie on 24 May 2014, 01:32 said:

    sanguine, funny that you mentioned Maradonia, since I was planning to say I miss the strain of madness it represented. Sure, the story went nowhere but at least there was some semblence of a plot that could have happened.

    Besides, as fun as demon werewolfs and Evil Demonic Accountant Avery Oliver are, they have nothing on such classics like Appolyon’s Club of Evil, Gothic Movement, recreational starting of forest fires and “what about the poison?”.

    I wish Gloria finished Battle for the Key.

  4. Lone Wolf on 24 May 2014, 05:02 said:

    Wait. A negative Amazon review mentioned the appearance of Holocaust victims in the book. Were they in the book, or was the reviewer confused?

    The ending, with everyone feeling hollow without any particular explanation, nicely sums up the overall feeling of the book – melancholy, but really random. It’s a strange feeling. The adventures of Harlow give me the creeps somewhat, the way the joyful adventures of Maya and Joey never did.

  5. The Smith of Lie on 24 May 2014, 05:49 said:

    Wait. A negative Amazon review mentioned the appearance of Holocaust victims in the book. Were they in the book, or was the reviewer confused?

    Well, there was one of the time travelling guys, whose family died in the Holocaust – possibly he got the Rummel Style Flashback.

  6. Guest on 27 May 2014, 03:50 said:

    Just wanted to say the conjugal felicity page doesn’t seem to have updated properly.
    Anyway, thanks for showing the drawings. It’s so sad how many artists go uncredited online in particular. “Awfully strong resemblance” is a definite euphemism. Look at the details: the curves of the model, the ivy leaves’ positions and shapes. It’s clearly traced.