Welcome to the II Asylum. Due to the Flying Castle falling into disuse, a new system has started in its place.

Prepare to make yourself known to the doctors, nurses, and guards of our humble organization. And remember that in the madhouse, no one will hear you scream…

Geez, you love attempting to scare people, don’t you?

Ha-ha, so we claim new parts of this castle now?

Hey, when are users active on this forum? Morn, noon, night….

‘kay….

Torture chambers, weaponry and anything involved in fighting, I own them. ^^ I love fighting.

Oh WW! You’re the baker here aren’t you?

Let it be known that No one. is Head Torturer, Willow is Head of the West Asylum, and I shall be Head of the North Asylum.

Are you sure, Marquis? Generally putting me in charge of things is a bad idea…

Ooh! I declare that the West Asylum shall have weekly movie nights, with popcorn, cookies, pizza, and all other kinds of delicious artery-hardening foods! Also, on Saturday afternoons the West Asylum shall celebrate the weekend with Tea Time (tea, crumpets, clotted cream, scones, jams, petit fours etc. abound)!

Oooh, Head torturer!! XD

@WW: I asked because I sometimes bake things… you don’t mind if I pop into the kitchen to make myself something every now and then?

BTW watch out for my pack of Elemental wolves… they will not hestitate to kill.

For more info on Elemental wolves (aka E-wolves), just ask me! ^^

Good parts about your scenario:

No internet, therefore I’ll write more. The books can be fuel that I can set on fire to keep me warm. Twilight is my motivation. I shall fight against it by writing more.

And Joss Whedon can learn to type his ideas with his toes, or I’ll just steal his brain in a complicated surgery.

Plus I still have the whole crew of Serenity, and they’re unharmed.

Yes, but you are also obliged to hire, feed, and train the guards to the entrance.

I, of course, control the Gibbering Wing, a.k.a. the Babel Tower, for all of the weirdoes like me who babble in nonsense language.

No one, can I visit the weapons room on occasion? I have a (locked) cabinet in there for my own use and storage.

Please make sure my cabinet stays locked, RVL? Some of the victims things inside can be… noisy.

No One, it looks like you’ve been demoted to Igor to RVL’s Dr. Frankenstein. The Harley to RVL’s Joker. The… Kid Flash to RVL’s Flash. The Buckey to RVL’s Captain America. The Munsters to RVL’s Addams Family. Et cetera.

Please make sure my cabinet stays locked, RVL? Some of the victims things inside can be… noisy.

Of course, Taku. Iron vaults it is!
No one., I suppose we can share the weapons… I get the most lethal ones though! As for your screws and candles… I SCOFF AT THEM. My torture chamber consists of Iron Maiden’s, among other primitive medieval torture devices. So don’t go stealing my dungeons.

WW, mostly characters that are very disagreeable (they are alive in the Castle, as well as ALL THE OTHER CHARACTERS IN THE WORLD OF BOOKS) (I KNOW, IT’S AN AMAZING THOUGHT) but occasionally the people who try to break in. After all, out accommodations are quite desirable, are they not? ;)
Oh, and your food rations would be most welcome. :D

If diamond is the hardest rock, shall we made an iron maiden out of that and stick him in it? Even then he wouldn’t die… I think we’d have to pour boiling pots of oil on his head and then burn him after putting him through the iron maiden. Now I need someone willing to make me a diamond iron maiden… Anyone?
Oh, oh, as a reward you can help me kill him!

Dibs on the garage! Maybe I can string up some high-speed wireless while I’m in there…

Since the dungeons have been taken already, I’ll go with the tower floating above the main hall.

That sounds like fun! How much is the entry fee?
Can I pay in rides on the various flying beasties living in the nest atop my turret?

The electricity shall only be used for electroshock therapy, the paper shall be entirely in the size of square millimeters, the books shall all be Atlas Shrugged, the shelves will all be crooked and easily breakable, and the phone will produce an ear-piercing, hissing sound whenever someone calls you. Also, the phone-number for it shall be given out to all of the inmates.

I’m away for one night and find this.

@RVL: I’ll help. Although you’re NOT getting the most lethal weapons. If you insist on having the most lethal, I’m afraid we’ll have to battle it out.

Scoff at screws!? You, madam, (it is madam, right?) obviously don’t know the torture that involves candles and screws. First, you heat up the screws with the candle flame, which is mild enough not to melt it. Then, you drill the heated up screws into the victims head. Then, you grab the screws (with pincers or wench or whatever) and yank it out. The screws’ grip will make it harder to pull, but hearing the victim’s scream will be worth it. It’s quite painful and will leave scars behind.

Since I’m still somewhat of a beginner, RVL, will you be my mentor in tortures as I can see we have the same interest?

Oh and if you’re seeking some torture for Bella and Edward, must it be the iron maiden? Why not the iron virgin or some other torture techniques? Why choose the iron maiden?

I disapprove of torture.

How much is the entry fee?

Maybe a few candles… There really isn’t much light down here…
No one., I WAS HERE FIRST = I GET PRIORITY. Plus, I’d totally beat you if it came to a fight. ;)

smirks. Brings up bow and arrow and shoots at RVL then breaks TakuGifan’s sword You should know that the longer a sword, the heavier and weaker.

Aaanyway… where can I find the toilet?

Rocky! Thrae! Shadow! Light! Come over here… got a task for you guys.

@Pearl: Yeah, it IS against the Declaration of Human Rights… so I guess torture’s out… unless II doesn’t follow Human Rights…

RVL, No One, I see you have a little skirmish on your hands. I’d like to point out that I can provide very effective weapons or mercenaries, for, shall we say, a small fee.

so I guess torture’s out… unless II doesn’t follow Human Rights…

But Edward isn’t human! And, apparently, nor is RVL. I’m also sure that she’s not the only one of questionable humanity among us.

Valid point. No torturing.

If you insist on fighting though, I’m totally backing RVL.

If you insist on fighting though, I’m totally backing RVL.

WW, I am honored that you’ve chosen me. :D
No one., the deal seems pretty fair, but not really a deal… Shall we call it a surrender? ;)
Puppet, OK, OK, I’ll try and be a little more mature… sigh
Anyway… DUNGEONS ARE MINE!
Heheh.
;P

Can you just move to another place? Or, how about this, BUILD YOUR OWN DUNGEON SOMEWHERE ELSE. And leave me alone to brood.

I’m not sure I’d trust you with the keys/guns/cameras/turrets/swarms of remote-controlled robot guard gerbils.

Heheh… ;)

oh crap, the post of head torturer is taken. Dammit. Do we already have a chief of security? Cause if not, I have “sight as a falcon” !

Ouch! My hand just moved on its own and slapped me, I dont know why…

As it is a storage closet, would a mop be more appropriate?

Oh. Hey, I got my own army of wolves to protect/guard/attack/defend etc….

What can I do to prove to you that I’m trustworthy!? T^T

RVL’s a mod? Oh. I didn’t know that. ‘Kay.

What, I have to compete for position of Chief security? Well, since my hearing’s poor, to make up for that I’ve got a stronger sense of smell, powerful eyesight and a more sensitive touch! ^^ And my wolves are my ears.

No one: what sort of poor hearing are you talking about? Because if we have to compete for position as Resident Deafie, so shall be it. What?

Hrm. So is the roof still free? Because dibs on that.

No one: I guess you win, I only have moderate bilateral congenital sensorineural hearing loss, not profound. I have aids, but I could feasibly survive without them. Very uncomfortable and confusedly, but there are different levels of survival.

Just out of curiosity, is your loss congenital (born with) or aquired? sensorineural (nerves, etc) or conductive?

Ooh, do your aids have the telecoil setting? Have you tried using it while passing under high-voltage power lines? Freaky.

Conductive is when the sound waves don’t reach your inner ear at all, either due to blockage, malformed eardrum, midssing/malformed bones, or so on.

I can’t lipread too well, but I do rely more than I think I do on body language and lipreading (it’s just that it’s not a skill I can consciously employ, but trying to hear somewoine when there’s a light behind them is somehow much more difficult than when I can see their face).

Down here in Melbourne, the trams sound like electric guitars on telecoil setting, and the train sounds like… really high-pitched whalesong? It’s difficult to describe.

do they know what caused it in you? As far as I know, mine was either genetic or mercury poisoning.

ah, you get the telephone thing, huh? Say, do you remember analogue mobile phones? Those things were crazy, even on the normal setting.

Yes, I live in Melbourne. Yes, it’s much better than Sydney :P

Anyway, we are in danger of deraling this thread.

I have claimed the Babel Tower, with its lovely soundproof walls and lack of sharp edges. I also claim the electroshock room, just because nobody else has, yet. (Hey, it’s an Asylum. What sort of asylum doesn’t have free electric shocks whenever and to any portion of your anatomy you desire?)

Oh, we all assumed you’d want the falconry tower, Lenka. I haven’t touched it, myself. Perfectly equipped for all your raptors’ needs.

Hmm, so if I’m Lord (Lady?) of the Rooftops, do I get the tower rooftops, too, or do those belong to the tower owners? And why is Puppet holding a giant syringe toward me?

I want the Falcon Tower! Thank you for mentioning it, Taku:)

Can I have a closet? With a shelf? I truly don’t ask for very much.

@helvengurl – blue pills? blue pills? giggle you will be lucky if they only give you blue pills and not entrust you in my care. pulls out a soft, fluffly feather my procedures only produce permanent results>:3

Cowers in corner

I think I should attack.

I just soiled myself.