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Twilight: New Moon Trailer #3 = Lessons on codependency

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    Heck yes, ladies. You know you need an arm to catch you every time you….take a step. How? Watch THIS VIDEO

    •  
      CommentAuthorJeni
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    NAKED BOYS!

    8D

  3.  

    Yes, very good, Jeni. “Objectifying males” is another important lesson from this series.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    Naked boys? Ewww.

    Your warning came just in time. I was just about to watch it.

    •  
      CommentAuthorElanor
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    O_O

    So.

    Much.

    Shirtlessness.

    •  
      CommentAuthorJeni
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    It.

    Is.

    Glorious.

    •  
      CommentAuthorPuppet
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    I… Don’t want to see it now. :P

    •  
      CommentAuthorApep
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    Am I the only one who thought Edward’s “Promise me you won’t do anything reckless” line sounds like something a parent says to a child? Not, “Be carefull”, or “Be safe”, like he actually, I don’t know, cares about her. “Don’t do anything reckless”, like Bella’s his teenage daughter or something.

  9.  

    I don’t know. It sounds like something I’d say to a friend who couldn’t walk without tripping.

    Wellll, no. I’d phrase it differently. And, Bella isn’t really a reckless person—I mean, when it comes to things not Edward. Before him, she was doing laundry and her homework over the weekend, going to school, and not doing anything else.

    like Bella’s his teenage daughter or something.

    I partially agree, then.

    Kirsten Stewart’s scream as she’s writhing in her bed… erm… It was uncomfortable. Also, is it just me, or does it sound creepy when Jacob is talking to Bella about him being better (“I would never, ever to that to you.”)? And her “No, Edward! Don’t!” sounds incredibly awkward to me.

  10.  

    Jacob looks much better with short hair. :D

    But yeah, the screaming-in-bed made me wince. And the pseudo-epic choir music at the end was so not convincing me.

  11.  

    Seeing Bella jump into the ocean to get Edward’s attention made me want to punch the computer screen.

    •  
      CommentAuthorJeni
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009 edited
     

    Jacob looks much better with short hair. :D

    Oh, definitely. Very few guys can successfully pull off long hair, in my opinion.

    (I’m not actually that fond of the long hair look).

    •  
      CommentAuthorSpanman
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    So many lulz will be had.

  14.  

    Seeing Bella jump into the ocean to get Edward’s attention made me want to punch the computer screen.

    That whole part with Bella-miserable-without-Edward was annoying.

    And did anyone else giggle when Edward was about to reveal himself? I just found that part ludicrous. It also looked like he was wearing lipstick half the time. XD

    •  
      CommentAuthorSpanman
    • CommentTimeSep 18th 2009
     

    I’m sure Robert Pattinson just loves looking like a sweaty wax model about nine-tenths of the time.

  16.  

    It also looked like he was wearing lipstick half the time. XD

    I really don’t want to look for that lipgloss pic again to prove my point.

    •  
      CommentAuthorArtimaeus
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2009 edited
     

    Did RP really have to be shirtless there? I don’t care how cut he is; his skin is the same color as a fish belly… And since when was Jacob so demanding and manipulative?

    The Vultori look cool though.

  18.  

    I didn’t think Meyer characters ever said “Hell.” That almost made them cool for a second there.

    • CommentAuthorliadan14
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2009
     

    Does it bother anyone else that, whenever he’s talking to Bella, Robert Pattison gets this expression of extreme confuddledness? And talks really really really slowly? This and the close-ups have to be my biggest pet peeve about the actual movie (looking beyond the plot, the characters, etc.)

    And also, I have said this before, comparing Edward to Jacob on screen is a dumb idea, because they a) have a huge giant car, so when they glared at each other in the first movie through their windows, Jacob was about three feet higher up than Edward, and b) Jacob is all Bronzed and Manly and Stuff (because we have no originality in character portrayal. Wouldn’t a wimpy werewolf be awesome?) and when you put Edward next to him, Edward just always looks like a frat boy on crack.

    I am not impressed. The only way I’m watching this is if someone else pays for it.

  20.  

    Because scrunched up faces = acting…
    “This is the last time you’ll ever see me…”
    GIVE ME A BREAK!

  21.  

    “This is the last time you’ll ever see me…”

    I wish it was!

    heh heh.

    •  
      CommentAuthorSpanman
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2009 edited
     

    Really. D:

    I didn’t think Meyer characters ever said “Hell.” That almost made them cool for a second there.

    It surprised me, but she does a few times in books 2, 3, and 4. In times of extreme stress, someone may even throw out a damn. Especially Jacob, and sometimes Bella. Not Edward though, because he’s too sophisticated, amazing, and morally strong. too bad, because the occasional swearing seems to be the only reason I kept reading.

  23.  

    HOLY CROW!

  24.  

    Not Edward though, because he’s too sophisticated, amazing, and morally strong.

    Although he has 0 etiquette skills. As in no stalking. Moron.

    •  
      CommentAuthorEmil 1.4021
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2009 edited
     
    Is it just me, or were they able to go through the entire storyline in that one 2-3 minute trailer?

    ..... Guess the rest of the movie is just filler.
    •  
      CommentAuthorElanor
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2009
     

    Does it bother anyone else that, whenever he’s talking to Bella, Robert Pattison gets this expression of extreme confuddledness? And talks really really really slowly?

    XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

    I hadn’t noticed that, actually. But I prefer to attribute it to Robert Pattinson hating the movie and subverting it.

  27.  

    Not Edward though, because he’s too sophisticated, amazing, and morally strong. too bad, because the occasional swearing seems to be the only reason I kept reading

    In the trailer he did, though, in an appropriate place, and it made me forget how Edward is the worst character ever for a fleeting second.

    •  
      CommentAuthorRandomX2
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2009 edited
     

    The trailer actually seemed decent, but Emill put it best by saying that the whole movie was practically summarized in two minutes. It was OK to watch, but I dunno. When I try to think up of a follow up to any good part of the trailer I come up blank. I’m envisioning a lot of awkward silences in the full version.

    •  
      CommentAuthorEmil 1.4021
    • CommentTimeSep 19th 2009 edited
     
    Indeed, Random, that was what I though of as well xD

    Twenty minutes in the very least of Patty looking as he just threw up a little in his mouth and trying to swallow it without anyone noticing....
    • CommentAuthorliadan14
    • CommentTimeSep 20th 2009
     

    At least thirty of close-ups on Bella’s eyes, nose and mouth, with varying degrees of makeup, depending on how upset she is.

    •  
      CommentAuthorswenson
    • CommentTimeSep 20th 2009 edited
     

    You know what her writhing scream sounds like? A Fell Beast. Srsly. Listen to it again- it’s like a cross between a Fell Beast and a fast headcrab zombie.

    EDIT: After finishing the whole thing, I’m afraid I’m really, really going to turn out Team Jacob. gack Or at least Team Taylor Lautner.

  32.  

    MY BRETHREN, WELCOME THE CONVERT!

    • CommentAuthorliadan14
    • CommentTimeSep 20th 2009
     

    By virtue of Jacob having actual character development, occasionally, I liked him better throughout the books. I didn’t want him to end up with Bella though. He actually got cool points once in a while. She didn’t. Ever.

    •  
      CommentAuthorElanor
    • CommentTimeSep 20th 2009
     

    Ditto to that. After watching the trailer, Jacob gained some major character points, whereas Bella lost some, if that’s even possible anymore, and Edward was, as usual, kinda hilariously apathetic.

  35.  

    Wouldn’t a wimpy werewolf be awesome?

    The werewolf in Being Human is pretty wimpy…

    Taylor really does look better with short hair too.

  36.  
    No......just no.....
    "DERRR"
    Snuggies
    and far too much shirtlessness. *gag*
    Screaming in bed? Not merited unless you are in intense physical pain. Sorry.
    My life is over. Twilight just raped E.S. Posthumous.
  37.  

    I like this version better.

  38.  

    Hee hee hee. I’ve watched about three minutes of it. Good find.

    •  
      CommentAuthorApep
    • CommentTimeSep 21st 2009
     

    Wow… that’s just… wow.

  40.  

    XD

    LOL at the werewolf part.

    •  
      CommentAuthorPearl
    • CommentTimeSep 21st 2009
     

    What makes that trailer, well either one really, better is when you have been watching any other cheesy movie, such as What A Girl Wants (a guilty pleasure).

    The spoof what particularly excellent.
    The part with the spoon gave me fits.

  42.  

    So I finally watched it. Shame they’ve got to show all the action the movie will have in the trailer. That’s worse than a comedy showing all the funny parts. What’s up with the color scheme change? #1 had a blue tint to it, and this one has a sepia tint?

    I do have to think it for inspiration. Time to crank the NM chapters up again and have the war tear through Japan.

    •  
      CommentAuthorswenson
    • CommentTimeSep 22nd 2009
     

    Hahaha, nice GIF.

  44.  

    Your welcome Swenson.

    It’s like sephira once said. You gotta love Twilight for giving us some of the best gifs ever seen.

  45.  

    Indeed.

    •  
      CommentAuthorswenson
    • CommentTimeSep 22nd 2009
     

    Hahaha! I could understand the confusion and headaches and drowsiness… but when it got to the blindness, seizures, and death, I realized that this gif must be immediately placed on ALL copies of the Twilight “Saga” everywhere in the world. For the betterment of humanity.

    (or we can burn them all, but bookburning is evil. Even begrudging sigh when it’s of Twilight)

  47.  

    Lol, the confusing thing is when the GIFs get so long and you’re not sure when the start is. And I hate reading the punchline before the beginning.

    MOAR!

  48.  

    youtube’s playing up, and all I’m getting is the audio. It sounds so cheesy, and I thought Bella’s scream was a horse. I kind of want to see it, though, since I’ve read the book.

  49.  

    Kristen looks like she’s going to act this one which means we’ll finally get a 2 dimensional Bella.

  50.  

    Oh brilliance. Color me unimpressed. I am sorry, but the god chorus does nothing to me anymore. The wolves are ugly, the way Bella deals with the breakup is P.A.T.H.E.T.I.C. and so is the gratuituos shirtlessnes. Yeah, well, half – naked 17 year – olds just dont do it for me anymore. Give me a real man, someone like Gerard Butler or Christian Bale. You know, somebody with hair in all the right places instead of these little waxed and oiled barbie dolls, polished to look pretty for the shelves in the eyecandy store (I probably should stop reading so much Palahniuk:P). I am afraid that if I even look at them with lust, I will be arrested for molesting a minor:P

    But the good thing is – male objectification finally appeared! (not that it is a good thing, but it has a feeling of satisfaction to it)

    Other than that, I could not possibly care less.

  51.  

    I am afraid that if I even look at them with lust, I will be arrested for molesting a minor:P

    You’d have plenty of company if they started doing that, given the TwiMoms.

    •  
      CommentAuthorApep
    • CommentTimeSep 23rd 2009
     

    Probably not. Age of consent varies from state to state, and it’s 16-17 in most of the US.

    • CommentAuthorWiseWillow
    • CommentTimeSep 23rd 2009
     

    Christian Bale? Empress, I wholeheartedly approve!

    •  
      CommentAuthorswenson
    • CommentTimeSep 23rd 2009
     

    ^^ Agreed.

  55.  

    Thank you:)

  56.  

    ^^Agreed.

  57.  

    Christian Bale will always be Laurie from Little Women, so I must love him. ;)

    •  
      CommentAuthorApep
    • CommentTimeSep 24th 2009
     

    Just don’t watch American Psycho. Bale is…creepy.

  59.  

    Christian Bale will always be Thomas from Pocahontas to me. And then Laurie. Actually, Thomas is like the red-haired cartoon version of Laurie, so yeah.

  60.  

    Weirdly, the first movie I ever saw him in was American Psycho. If it weren’t for Batman, he would always be the guy who made bizarre poses in the mirror while having sex.

  61.  

    If it weren’t for Batman, he would always be the guy who made bizarre poses in the mirror while having sex.

    Wait, I thought that was Batman.

  62.  

    Christian Bale is the guy from Equilibrium.

  63.  

    He also threw a hissy fit during Terminator Salvation.

  64.  

    He also threw a hissy fit during Terminator Salvation

    he did? oh well. hollywood does things to you, I guess.

  65.  

    he did? oh well. hollywood does things to you, I guess.

    You never heard the rant? It was big for a few weeks.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeSep 25th 2009
     

    There was quite an amusing dub of it over the scene of Howl (that was Bale, too…) shouting at Sophie at the end of an Abridged episode.

  67.  

    THEY ABRIDGED HOWL’S MOVING CASTLE??? WHY HAVE I NOT HEARD????

    I do not apologise for the capsrape.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeSep 25th 2009
     

    Sorry, I’m being unclear again.

    At the end of each episode of Yugioh Abridged, there’s a short Yugioh clip overdubbed with sound from another well-known pop culture thing. In this case, a clip from Howl’s Moving Castle was used with the sound from Bale’s cameraman rant.

    I don’t think the film itself has been abridged. Sorry to disappoint you!

  69.  

    he did? oh well. hollywood does things to you, I guess.

    Well to be fair, the other guy deserved it

    (for a more serious take)

    •  
      CommentAuthorSpanman
    • CommentTimeSep 25th 2009 edited
     

    I saw Terminator Salvation once but obviously I forgot it. Because until now I ddidn’t even remember that it had Christian Bale in it. Huh.

  71.  

    (that was Bale, too…)

    Ooh, I’d forgotten that. Yeah, Christian Bale is Thomas first, Laurie second, and Howl a close but convincing third.

  72.  

    No Batman?!

    Yeah, well. Even the Twilight thread got off topic. is ashamed

  73.  
    I guess it was just painful to talk about for too long....
  74.  

    @Emill – lol and isnt it? I personally have a hard time resisting the urge to go on a murderous rampage everytime somebody mentions the damn “saga” just because of Bellas portrayal. And where is it worse than in New Moon? boyfriend leaves so I go cathartic for months? Become suicidal just so I can hear his voice in my head ? excuse my french but fuck thats retarded. I honestly feel insulted on so many levels… okay, I will stop before i go to rage mode

    Christian Bale or Gerard Butler, on the other hand, are much more pleasant topics for conversation:P

    •  
      CommentAuthorswenson
    • CommentTimeSep 27th 2009
     

    @SWQ – well, we can only talk about Twilight for about three posts before our eyeballs start bleeding, so I suppose we just had to find something else…

    I’m not a big movie person (except for geeky ones), so the first thing I ever saw Christian Bale in (when I knew he was Christian Bale and not just “that guy that plays Laurie”) was Batman. So he’s Batman first, Laurie second for me.

    •  
      CommentAuthorEmil 1.4021
    • CommentTimeSep 28th 2009 edited
     
    @Falcon - Yeah, well, you know hearing about the damned books/movies is ineviteable either way, since everyone IRL seems to talk about them ??all the frickin' time.?? Two of my friends do, and I'm dumbstruck at what to do, since I'm sort of the new kid and I don't really wish to piss anyone off so early on..... (I my class there's 5 girls with me included, 13 boys.... ??Heeeeeell yeeeeeah??)

    .... But seriously, who the hell get that sort of treatment on their first day....? I mean, my class is basically a male harem, and I still don't. (Maybe it's the narcissist in me but, I consider myself to be quite good-looking.... x3)

    Either way, I think glittering gives off sort of gay vibes...
    • CommentAuthorUn-Dante'd
    • CommentTimeSep 28th 2009
     

    Brings to mind the image of Bella jumping off a cliff. Instead of her screaming in emotional agony in her bed, all I heard was “DURRRRRRRRR!”

  78.  

    LOL.

    That visual will now stay with me forever.

  79.  

    I want to see it and throw popcorn at it. But I’ve been forbidden by my excellent mother.

  80.  

    Should we set up viewing parties?

    •  
      CommentAuthorPuppet
    • CommentTimeSep 28th 2009
     

    I’m going to yell out “DURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR”, when Bella jumps off the cliff. I don’t care if I get kicked out, it will be worth it.

  82.  

    New article on II:
    “Dear friends, we come here today to morn puppet, taken from us too soon by a pack of rabid twilight fans (but I repeat myself). Let us all have a moment of silence for this brave martyr…”

    •  
      CommentAuthorswenson
    • CommentTimeSep 28th 2009
     

    bows head in silence

  84.  

    joins swenson in head-bowing Rest in peace, Puppet.

  85.  

    morn puppet,

    You mean “mourn Puppet.” D:<

    • CommentAuthorUn-Dante'd
    • CommentTimeSep 28th 2009
     

    Shakes fists in rage
    We must have revenge.

  87.  

    Lights candles for vigil

    • CommentAuthorUn-Dante'd
    • CommentTimeSep 28th 2009
     

    I… I can’t take it. Those beasts have to die!
    I know that they were once innocent girls, but they’ve become something less than human, something… evil.

    •  
      CommentAuthorPuppet
    • CommentTimeSep 28th 2009
     

    Yeah… This is a bit much.

    •  
      CommentAuthorSpanman
    • CommentTimeSep 29th 2009
     

    Here in Redneckutopia, I will be going to New Moon at midnight if I have to slit throats to get there. The lulzy experience is just too important to miss.

  91.  

    Spanman, you live in Texas?

    I seriously want to do it.

    •  
      CommentAuthorJeni
    • CommentTimeSep 29th 2009
     

    Eh, I doubt I’ll go unless I can find someone else who doesn’t like Twilight.

    Unfortunately I already know someone who does. This makes it difficult.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeSep 29th 2009
     

    Eh, I doubt I’ll go unless I can find someone else who doesn’t like Twilight.

    Same here. Also, I haven’t seen/read the first one, and it would be wrong to watch them out of order.

  94.  

    I haven’t seen the first one, and I don’t like watching things out of order, either, but I thought, hey, it’s rubbish, who cares?

  95.  

    Ok, to everyone that hasn’t seen the first one:

    Bella moves.
    She loves Edward.
    He’s a vampire
    Other vampires hurt her.

    The End.

    Now you’re ready for the sequel.

  96.  
    You forgot to say that they go to the prom at the end of it. That was like the most important part! Except for the baseball. Baseball was cool.

    And yes, Nate, I'm fully aware that the movie has the same content as the book *koffkoff*
  97.  

    Hence the humor of my post. =D

  98.  
    The humour of my post was that 'content' can be taken multiple ways.
  99.  

    Sort of like how multiple equations can give you 0?

  100.  

    My answer to that is: for x(x-9), x = 0 or x= +9. Which means, yes. Sort of.

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