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    No, weirdest part? Neither Andrew nor Sam had any idea about each other. I did tell Andrew about Sam after both of them were hitting on me, but Sam had no idea that I was, er, sort of off-the-market.

    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2010

    No, weirdest part? Neither Andrew nor Sam Jacob nor Edward had any idea about each other. I did tell Andrew about Sam Jacob about Edward after both of them were hitting on me, but Sam Edward had no idea that I was, er, sort of off-the-market.



    .... screw you, Puppet. Also, you got the names wrong… I’m dating Andrew, so he’d be Edward oh-god-this-is-messed-up DO NOT COMPARE MY LIFE TO THE CRAP THAT IS TWILIGHT. EVER!

    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2010

    Do not post about your love life in the Twilight Thread. xD


    It came up! And Smartie started it! And, and… grr :P


    OK, back on topic.

    Clearly, Bella is supposed to be a bland, personality-less character so that the core demographic (11-18 year old girls) can identify with her. Now, did Smeyer do this on purpose, or was it a fortuitous accident?


    I say fortuitous accident- Bella’s personality is probably more-or-less Smeyer’s personality (or lack thereof).

    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2010

    “Fortuitous” isn’t quite the word I would’ve used…

    I agree with WW. I don’t think Smeyer set out to write the character anyone could put themselves in the shoes of, it just sort of happened that way and definitely helped the books’ popularity along.


    I don’t think Smeyer set out to write the character anyone could put themselves in the shoes of, it just sort of happened that way

    But it actually would’ve been a smart strategy if she had done it on purpose.

    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2010
    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2010

    Hahaha! That’s brilliant. And so very, very true.

    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2010

    The 8-Bit Eclipse Interactive video has probably been mentioned already, but here it is for if it hasn’t.


    ^^It was, and it’s actually quite entertaining.


    I don’t think Smeyer set out to write the character anyone could put themselves in the shoes of, it just sort of happened that way
    But it actually would’ve been a smart strategy if she had done it on purpose.

    I think I’d die if I tried to do that. It’d be so boring.

    Anyway, I don’t get why they didn’t change Bella’s character in the movies. They could’ve, you know. They could’ve changed so much about Twilight, and nobody’d blame them, because that’s what happens when books are adapted for movies.


    EXACTLY. Then again, if they changed too much then the fans would murder the moviemakers.

    • CommentTimeJul 4th 2010

    “...What’s this? Why is Edward burning in the sun???”


    Eclipse is not for young children. I think I like this reviewer. I also like that she suggests that younger kids read Narnia or Harry Potter instead. Of course, it’s on a kid by kid basis, but in general…


    EXACTLY. Then again, if they changed too much then the fans would murder the moviemakers.

    Eh… they could try. I think the world would thank the moviemakers, though. A lot of my friends said that Twilight the movie was underwhelming and they became fans of the books rather than the movies. So the moviemakers could’ve done worse than change a bunch. They could also have just said it was inspired by the book rather than based on it.


    Eclipse is not for young children.

    My friend read the Twilight saga, but she told her younger sister that she wasn’t allowed to read beyond New Moon.

    • CommentTimeJul 5th 2010

    And the latest Twilight related atrocity is…

    Making Neil Gaiman remove a character from his next book.


    This is so sad. Read the comments.

    I felt so sorry for the girls who posted things like ‘this girl doesn’t get it’.





    There are no words for this.


    They are Hive Mind and they are Legion, for they are many.


    ^^Yes, we have all read that XKCD comic. We know that even Anonymous fears the might of the Twihards.

    • CommentTimeJul 6th 2010

    Impossible! Anonymous is invincible, so Anonymous has no fears.


    Can somebody link to the comic? I went on an archive binge a while ago, but I’ve forgotten that one existed.

    • CommentAuthormelanthes
    • CommentTimeJul 6th 2010

    About Edward and Bella’s relationship being abusive – I found someone the other day who argued that their relationship was abusive, but it was Bella who’s the abuser, because she walks all over Edward and he lets her. I think her examples were the fact that Edward just lets her dally around with Jacob, and maybe even the whole Bella demanding to be changed into a vampire thing. Thoughts?


    Yeah, there were some points in Eclipse where Edward just seemed like the submissive part of the couple, like when Bella kept demanding sex even thought Edward said no.


    Hate to double post, but I found this significant.

    Apparently, watching Twilight can literally kill you!

    • CommentTimeJul 7th 2010

    Nonono, the better title was the “bored to death” one.


    The Real Edward:

    It was on ABC Family today.


    The man with the mechanical arm begs to differ.


    Aw, I love Edward Scissorhands! He’s so much cooler than sparkly!Edward.

    • CommentTimeJul 8th 2010 edited

    “No Jacob’s the best!” Konk

    • CommentTimeJul 9th 2010

    @ Puppet

    I’m not sure if that movie’s going to actually be funny or not, given the recent trend in parodies…



    It’s by Friedberg and Seltzer, any movie with their hands on it is automatically pure bile. I’d rather watch Twilight several times over than go to one of those pitiful excuses for comedy.


    joke at twilight’s expense == BEST TRAILER EVER

    • CommentTimeJul 14th 2010

    Well, that’s one way to get guys into a theater…

    • CommentTimeJul 14th 2010
    It says 'this video is no longer available' :/
    • CommentTimeJul 14th 2010

    Curse you, Motion Picture Association, and (this particular one of) your copyright claims!


    I’m assuming it’s The Expendables manly trailer. My brother showed it to me last night, and I’m pretty sure I’m going to see it on principle now.


    Edward is now on a magic card.


    What the hell is with MTG and vampires nowadays? Sorta glad I don’t play anymore.


    Even a wiki pointed that out.

    Magic 2011 continues to push vampires as a major black tribe. It contains more vampires than Magic 2010, and is the first core set to contain more vampires than zombies.

    I only collect the “fun” stuff (dragons and the duel decks) but if green starts getting werewolves… I’m setting it all on fire.

    • CommentTimeJul 17th 2010

    “Gee, I hope no one curses me with immortal sexiness.”

    Good one, Apep.

    • CommentTimeJul 18th 2010

    What the hell is with MTG and vampires nowadays?

    The official stance is that black needed a humanoid iconic creature type to go with elves, goblins, merrow and soldiers. That zombies already fulfilled this role very well, and the timing of the vampire focus, suggests that it was more likely one of Wizards’ many recent attempts to attract new players, though.


    Yeah, but zombies are popular too right now, and not in the chickified Twilight kind of way. Zombies at least have enough history to put them alongside those other iconic creature types.

    Just a dumb decision all around. Thanks, Twilight.


    This should be on II’s front page.


    ^^I just saw that five seconds ago. Haha.


    My college dean gave an introductory speech that eventually devolved into “How much Twilight sucks in comparison to How To Kill A Mockingbird.” My fears of the next four years have been slightly alleviated.


    MDC, it is your broral imperative to give that guy a brofist.


    How To Kill A Mockingbird

    It’s not an instructional guide.


    It’s not an instructional guide.

    Or is it?

    • CommentTimeJul 30th 2010

    Here’s something interesting: a scientific rationale for why Meyerpires sparkle.


    How To Kill a Mockingbird

    How did I miss that the first time? No offence to Marquise, but lies on floor and lulz


    Oh, me and my errors.

    goes off to angst about typos


    If you decide to cry a single liquid diamond, I’m outta here.

    • CommentAuthormelanthes
    • CommentTimeJul 31st 2010

    @ Apep

    I love that. If only that were the real explanation for Meyerpires…

    • CommentTimeJul 31st 2010

    For the lulz – Eclipse Abridged.

    A few choice bits:

    XAVIER SAMUEL: Holy shit, what’s a decent vampire film doing being spliced into the rest of this emo shit?

    BRYCE DALLAS HOWARD: Soon, I shall have an army of vampires! Then we can finally kill Wesley Snipes! And afterward, Robert Pattinson’s family!
    XAVIER SAMUEL: You’re in this? Aren’t you normally brought into movie franchises just as they’re starting to suck? Like Spider-Man, Terminator and M. Night Shyamalan’s career?
    BRYCE DALLAS HOWARD: I guess the director was hoping I’d have the opposite effect in a franchise that already sucks.
    XAVIER SAMUEL: It’s not working.

    NIKKI REED: Kristin, you shouldn’t become a vampire. Before I was a vampire, my life was perfect.
    KRISTIN STEWART: Wow, you actually get lines this time, huh? Don’t blow it by overacting.
    KRISTIN STEWART (CONT.): Aww, too late.
    NIKKI REED: 100 years ago, I had a crush on this guy. One day he and his four friends got drunk, brutally raped me in the street and left me for dead. Then I got turned into a vampire and got my revenge.
    KRISTIN STEWART: You and I have wildly different definitions of perfection.

    ASHLEY GREENE: You guys, I just got one of my plot-convenient visions of the future. Xavier Samuel and Bryce Dallas Howard are coming here. They’ll be here in four days!
    TAYLOR LAUTNER: Four days to get from Seattle to Forks? That’s a three-hour drive.

    KRISTIN and ROBERT sit together in a TENT while UNDERWORLD 4 happens 1,000 feet below them.

    PETER FACINELLI: The Volturi are coming. You need to get out of here, Dakota Fanning is more of a cat person.
    TAYLOR’S FAMILY takes him home.
    PETER FACINELLI: Seriously, where do their pants come from? Did they just keep a huge pile of pants behind a rock during the fight?

    And possibly the best part

    ROBERT PATTINSON: So I guess you’re the one we’ll have to defeat in the fourth movie, then? As long as Denzel Washington isn’t on guard detail, I think we can take you.
    DAKOTA FANNING: Oh, you didn’t hear? The last book has been split into two movies, so there’s two left.


    Oh my God, I remember this part in the book.:

    Wait guys, we’re in serious danger of this movie becoming interesting. Is there any way that this fighting could happen off screen while Robert, Taylor and I pout about our feelings in the mountains?

    Arg, it irks me so much that she can’t even write a decent action scene! Then again… She can’t even write a decent book…


    wrong thread. ignore this post


    Introduced my mom to Twilight: The Movie, because my brother wanted to spork it (did I mention how much I love my brother?). She dislikes the acting and the monochromatic color scheme. I have noticed that the movie, wonder of wonders, is better than the book.

    No, really.

    It’s really small, but it’s there. They actually gave Bella some character. For one thing, Kristin Stewart is spot-on playing Bella as an emo teen. movie!Bella actually shows emotion when she gets her truck, and when Edward says he’s going to leave her. Not to mention the scene in Port Angeles: Bella knees a rapist in the groin instead of just standing there thinking “I really should scream right about now.” And some things, like the Internet scene, translate better on the screen than paper.

    Also, I got to snicker at “THIS IS THE SKIN OF A KILLER, BELLA!” scene.


    The movie also contains Anna Kendrick, who I would pay money to watch in a feature role in some other, better movie.

    • CommentTimeAug 1st 2010 edited

    Ah yes, her talent is wasted on the Twilight Saga. Try Up in the Air.


    She’s playing Scott Pilgrim’s sister, too. This is one of the few cases I’d condone meddling with canon, so long as she gets a bigger role.

    • CommentTimeAug 1st 2010

    I’m disappointed that the guy did an 8-bit Twilight. Seriously. He followed up Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Game with THAT.


    Here’s something interesting: a scientific rationale for why Meyerpires sparkle.

    That is so awesome. I love it.


    I have noticed that the movie, wonder of wonders, is better than the book.

    Seconded. Whether or not you’re taking it seriously or in it for the lulz.


    double post

    Also, Cleolinda m15m’s Eclipse

    JACOB: marlonnnnn brandooooos

    EDWARD: jaaaaames deaaaaaaaaaans




    BELLA: About the what?

    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2010 edited

    Insanity Wolf has a suggestion for you.


    I can’t be the only one who needs this... right?


    I saw an image of Edward Cullen dressed as Sailor Moon. I can never unsee that again. Thanks a lot, Nate.

    • CommentAuthorNo One
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2010

    Uhhhh… great. Brain bleach time.


    And speaking of Sailor Moon, is it just me or does Stephenie Meyer look like the spitting image of Queen Beryl?


    Wrong thread. My bad. Do forgive me, I beg.


    EDIT: and now this comment is completely irrelevant. Sorry everyone!

    *Giggles hysterically*

    Edward as Sailor Moon. You know. . . he did look a lot like her. . .

    Oh, and I want a vuvuzuela.
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2010

    Oh, BY THE WAY, I forgot to say that a couple of days ago it was announced that Twilight is being re-released in the UK and Ireland in time for Christmas. With white covers. And crimson-edged pages.



    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2010

    Does is sparkle like Edward Cullen’s skin snow?

    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2010

    Surprisingly not, that could actually improve it tackiness-wise.

    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2010

    So yup, nothing special.

    And here’s the original UK covers for Twilight and New Moon:


    They made Bella look like Coraline…

    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2010

    Just watched Jeopardy, and the first round had Twilight trivia as a category. Admittedly, it was the teen Jeopardy, but still…


    Admittedly, it was the teen Jeopardy, but still…

    Yeah, not such a great excuse…

    • CommentTimeAug 13th 2010


    Well, at least the white-with-red-edges actually makes the books look attractive… although maybe that’s a bad thing. Go back to the horrific, terrifying cover! Then no one will read it!


    @Swenson – doesn’t it? Man I’d kill to have a book design like that.

    • CommentTimeAug 13th 2010 edited

    I like how Twilight is seemingly changing its book design to make it more distinctive from the shelves upon shelves of red- and black-themed books that exist primarily because of its own success.


    The red edges are quite unique looking. I haven’t seen many books with colored edges. The only ones I’ve seen were either silver or gold, and I’m pretty sure those were Bibles.


    They are eye-catching to be sure, but I’m not sure I really like them. Having black-edged pages would have been cooler, IMO.

    • CommentTimeAug 13th 2010

    I think the idea is to contrast white and red in comparison to the original black and red, hence the red-edged pages. ;)

    Personally I don’t like colour-edged pages, they rather irritate me. Especially red, such a distraction when I’m reading.


    I think the idea is to contrast white and red in comparison to the original black and red, hence the red-edged pages.

    I know, but it’s massively distracting, like you said.

    • CommentTimeAug 13th 2010

    I’ve seen Bibles with pale red page edges, but not that dark red.

    • CommentAuthorNo One
    • CommentTimeAug 14th 2010

    I’ve seen books with green page edges and blue page edges.