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General: Should I kill my dad or my GF?

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  1.  
    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2009
     

    I’ve had my GF for 2 years now (practically lives with me) – small white, petite thang, cooks for me, always been good to me.

    I go away on holiday for a week, come back and something just doesn’t seem right. I asked my dad if he had seen anything happen with my GF and he acts clueless.

    So fast forward to 3 weeks later… I’m coming home from work when BAM clear as day, right in my kitchen I catch my twat of a dad red handed with his meat in my GF.

    I was so fucking angry, told him to get his meat out of GF and to go fuck himself, needless to say my GF got turned off. I just couldn’t get over it and that night kicked my GF to the curb.

    Now it’s been 2 weeks since the incident and that I’ve been without my GF and about 10 minutes ago my dad had the audacity to ask my how my GF has been, when he’s the damn reason we ain’t together no more.

    Should I get off the computer and start swinging at him?

    OR

    Pack my stuff and be on my way.

    Here’s pics of my GF for you guys as I know you’ll ask

    http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g306/craig_t/DSC00132.jpg

    • CommentAuthorGolcondio
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2009
     

    I wouldn’t stick MY meat into that, mate…

  3.  

    WIN

    • CommentAuthorAdam
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2009
     

    Man, this made me laugh so hard…what possible reason is there for sinking the topic? (I guess not reading it all the way…)

  5.  

    ilu

    • CommentAuthorLord Snow
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2009
     

    I removed the sink thing.

    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2009
     
    I knew you were full of shit as soon as I started reading, but it was still fucking hilarious.
    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2009
     

    Don’t kill the GF!
    It may drain your memories, but the ability to equip skills and summon it in battle is invaluable.

    •  
      CommentAuthorRT3
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2009
     

    I knew he was full of shit as soon as he said he had a gf.

    Wipe them out. All of them.

  10.  

    LULZ

    •  
      CommentAuthorJabrosky
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     

    Is that thing really called a GF?

    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    It's a George Foreman grill.
    • CommentAuthorAri
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    You just totally made my day.
  14.  

    You asshole! To think I almost married you…! When you have a GF!!! storms out

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     

    I know! He’s such an insensitive jerk!
    .
    ..unlike me, for example. Are you doing anything later? Would you like to see my eyrie?

    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    Hey, baby, wanna light my pyre?
    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     

    It’s just entertainment babe. I swear!

  18.  

    I have had enough of your promises! And I am not your babe! We are done!

    offers an arm to Corsair and Moldorm

    Would you like to see Falcon Empire, gentlemen?

    •  
      CommentAuthorBlackwolf
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    Do you have another arm for lord Blackwolf m'lady?

    *Bows and extends arm*
  20.  

    @ Corsair:

    Are you thinking of a phoenix?

  21.  

    @Balckwolf – absolutely:) Thank you, kind sir

  22.  

    @ Corsair, Moldorm and Blackwolf:

    Um. Guys. I hate to say it, but this girl has three arms. Back away, slowly. She’s not normal…

  23.  

    @Steph – do not delve into the secrets of vampiric owls. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    I would very much like to survey your empire, Your Magnificence.

    @ Steph: Three arms? Think of the possibilities! Why don't you come and join us? I'm sure it'll be fun...
    •  
      CommentAuthorBlackwolf
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    nah, steph is hanging with edward sparkle. arent you, steph?
    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    Hmm...if I set Falcon on fire, she would be remarkably like a Phoenix.
  27.  

    @ Blackwolf:

    Do you really want me to answer that? You know what I’ll say, don’t you?

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    But then she would be dead. That is not a good thing.
    •  
      CommentAuthorBlackwolf
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    @ steph: please dont!!!
  30.  

    OH, no. Don’t set falcon on fire. For one thing, you’d lose a consort, three-armed though she be. (or are you guys the consorts?)

    @ Blackwolf:

    are you suuuuuuuuuuuuure?

    •  
      CommentAuthorBlackwolf
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    @steph: absolutely!
  32.  

    Okay then. But you don’t know what you’re missing out on.

    •  
      CommentAuthorBlackwolf
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    trust me i know... oh and yeh, glad to make ur acquaintance, finally.
  34.  

    who, me? is confuzzled, because often is not her

    •  
      CommentAuthorBlackwolf
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    oh yeh...even tho u didnt offcially welcome me...

    *sulks and sniffs*
  36.  

    You’re losing your punctuation, buddy. I think you need to go to sleep.

    I did look for your intro thread but I couldn’t find it. Probably the Butter Sybdrome.

    •  
      CommentAuthorBlackwolf
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    lol...nah. its the one that says 'blackwolf is in d house'...could i have been more obvious?
  38.  

    Butter Syndrome: That which should, by rights, be the most obvious, somehow escapes your notice.

    Normally applied when your mum asks you to look for the butter and you stare into the fridge for three whole minutes and can’t find it, and she pulls it out from right under your nose.

    I’m reasonably sure I didn’t make Butter Syndrome up.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     
    You did not.
  40.  

    Thank you, Steph:)

    does not want to be set on fire

    •  
      CommentAuthorPuppet
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     

    NOOOO!!!! IT“S A TRAP! FALCONPRESS IS LEADING YOU TO A DARK PLACE BEFORE SUCKING OUT YOUR BLOOD!!!

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 29th 2009
     

    But I like dark places and mysterious birds in positions of importance.

  43.  

    Vampiric falcons, huh? Are you sure falconempress isn’t just another creation of Smeyer’s?

    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     
    Hey, if you can have Vampire Bats, why not Vampire Falcons?
    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    Excuse me son what do you mean by you want to explore her empire?

  46.  
    This reached new levels of win.
    lol.
    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     
    Well, she has huge...tracts of land, sir.
    • CommentAuthorMorvius
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     
    Get a new one. Like this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KBXcpJfmj4
    •  
      CommentAuthorJeni
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    Excuse me son what do you mean by you want to explore her empire?

    SNARF.

    XD

  50.  

    there is no way for me to talk myself out of this without insinuating something else, is there? XD

    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     
    Not really, no.
    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    She has a nice empire. It’s very big and wealthy, one of the most powerful nations in the world, with its own unique culture and customs. Who wouldn’t want to explore it?
    I’m just grateful for the oppurtunity to do so myself! What wonders will I behold?! It’s enough to make one positively wriggle in delight!!!

    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    You are trespassing in my territory.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    Oh, isn’t this thread part of the Glorious Falcon Empire, renowned for its mastery of necromancy?
    Sorry, I must have been mistaken.

  55.  

    Oh. I thought you were complimenting her rack.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    By jove! You have quite upset my monocle. What a thing to say about her Awesomeness the Empress herself!

    My mental image of her does have a good one, though. In her torture chamber.

  57.  

    This is getting a tad kinky now, isn’t it?

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    ...not that kind of torture chamber.

  59.  

    You’re going to have to do a bit more if you want to convince me you’re not interested in Fempress and her bondage gear.

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009 edited
     

    I’m not interested in her bondage gear! Just an attractive and intelligent young woman who happens to hold a position of great power!

    EDIT:...political power! Not that other thing that you were thinking of!

  61.  

    Let’s hope not…

  62.  

    EDIT:...political power! Not that other thing that you were thinking of!

    Oh! Don’t go blaming me for your Freudian slips!

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    Curse you, Freud, and tall your furries poo!

    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    All women have political power tho.

  65.  

    I suddenly feel…unclean:P

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    Please let me cleanse you with my purifying tears/fire/love!

  67.  

    Psst. Its fire

    :P

    •  
      CommentAuthorMoldorm
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    I don’t know, she might prefer one of the others.

  69.  

    I dont think its that urgent but thank you for your kind offer:)

    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009 edited
     

    Don’t hate yourself. You have political power because you are a woman.

    You have the ability to control any non-thinking man in this world if you are attractive. And there are plenty.

  71.  

    I wasnt referring to that but thank you XD

    That whole man – control thing is actually much harder than it seems

    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009 edited
     

    It’s easy. Just cry about how mean the world is and some shmuck who wants to sleep with you will be your knight in shining armor.

    Oh, you mean sex. Sex is not nasty. Sex is hawt.

    •  
      CommentAuthorCorsair
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     
    The best part is that the non-thinking ones tend to get into positions of power. The downside to that is that there are already a bazillion women and actually thinking men manipulating those guys.
    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    IM HORNY NOA

  75.  

    Well, looking at the state of the world and politics today – are there any thinking people in the position of power? Some of them could use a manipulator behind their back

    • CommentAuthorCodeWizard
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2009
     

    Thinking people are rare. Though there are tons of people who pretend to be thinkers. Like 99% of scholars.

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