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  1.  

    He made a trailor for, get this, Ruin Mist THE MOVIE:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=faTKPNOcsNE

    and according to this, Robert Stanek is the “world acclaimed author” who wrote books for children and adults, including “The Kingdoms and the Elves of the Reaches.”

    http://www.youtube.com/user/TheRobertstanek#p/u/2/EdMdJU8i6KI

    Watch out, Gloria Tesch. Stanek is back, and he’s rivaling your marketing campaign with a passion!

    •  
      CommentAuthorInkblot
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     

    Oh, Rorschach is going to have a fit.

    leaves quickly

    •  
      CommentAuthorRorschach
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     

    My blood pressure just went through the roof.

    Oh god. The voice acting is just SO BAD. It makes me want to stuff parsley into my ears to drowned out the ridiculous pretentious voices.

    I love how for the Ruin Mist movie he says that it was voiced by “Karl Fehr”, who I’m pretty sure doesn’t actually exist. Partially because his voice is 100% identical to Stanek’s own voice.

  2.  

    He’s making a romance movie in the Honolulu zoo about tortoises (lolwut).
    The casting is as follows (in HIS words, not mine):
    Really slow tortoise.
    Really really slow tortoise.
    Mega super slow tortoise.

    I love how the bug story was mostly the bee rambling about random stuff that doesn’t matter, like that the farmer works for the mayor’s wife and why the mayor’s wife married the mayor.

    There’s an earthworm named Earthworm Tim. No joke.
    And SPOILERS the FEMALE silkworm slept over at the MALE bee’s house, and I estimate their ages to be about 6 or 7 years old. Well, I’m nitpicking with that one, because without a dirty mind it can still be perfectly harmless, but let your imaginations run wild and believe Robert is telling you it’s okay to let boys and girls from school sleep together. ROBERT STANEK. LITERARY GENIUS.

    •  
      CommentAuthorswenson
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     

    Bwahaha, he and Tesch should get together and just make one big horrible mess of a movie together. Maradonia + Ruin Mist = ??? but probably not profit.

    ROBERT STANEK. LITERARY GENIUS.

    QFT