The Reading Test: Eragon, Chapter 7 & Chapter 8

I woke up to the sound of breathing. All over the white room—I can’t avoid it. Even when I sit down here next to the shower stall, I can hear the breathing.

— — —

Chapter 7: A Name of Power

: “Hey, Eragon, me and Katrina—”
: “No one cares, Roran.” [runs off]
: “BUT I’M GETTING MARRIED!”
: “I SAID NO ONE CARES, RORAN!”

: “Hey dragon!”
: “Eragon!”
: “Why don’t you say something else?”
: “Fine.”
: “Dammit, I’m so angry right now! Roran’s such a douche! How dare he get married without my permission!”
: “…Mmkay.”
: “So, I guess I need to name you. That would probably be best.”
: “Um, yeah.”
: “How about Billy? No, Bob. Eh, that reminds me too much of Roran’s old roommate…uhhhh…how about Harry?”
: “Are you retarded?”
: “No, but…”
: “But what?”
: “Oh you’re probably a girl dragon, huh? Ahaha, okay.”
: “Can I get a new rider?”
: “Shut up, Saphira.”

— — —

Stop breathing on me. I’m trying to sleep. You’re not funny, voice—you’re just trying to make me believe I’m hearing things.

— — —

Chapter 8: A Miller-To-Be

: “Dad I wanna marry Katrina and go become a miller!”
: “No one cares, Roran.”

: [as real and complex as any person]
‘s personality: [eclectic and at times completely alien]
& : [understand each other on a profound level]
‘s actions and thoughts: [constantly reveal new aspects of her character]

: “Hey look, an eagle!”
: [catches it; releases it] “No hunter of the sky should end his days as prey. Better to die on the wing than pinned to the ground.”
: “Whatever, go get us some pheasants.”

Comment

I had no idea what the heck this is supposed to be.

Read the other ones…

In stitches here.

No one cares, Roran.

“How about Billy? No, Bob. Eh, that reminds me too much of Roran’s old roommate…uhhhh…how about Harry?”

I really thought you were going to make a HP reference here… DANGIT!

Another pretty funny one! Do keep it up Kitty!

Dead on. I love these! :)
Kitty, would you consider a polygamist marriage with my husband and me?

Psyphira: “No hunter of the sky should end his days as prey. Better to die on the wing than pinned to the ground.”
Eragon: “Whatever, go get us some pheasants.”

ZOMG. Win. Though knowing dragons, she’d probably prefer some peasants.

I wonder what the breathing references?

I’m curious about that myself.

My theory: reading Eragon is slowly driving our protagonist/narrator/whatever insane.

Also: “Are you retarted?”
BEST LINE EVER.

This was hilarious. “No one cares Roran!”

No one cares, Roran!

Haha..

priceless as always. The pheasants line made me giggle like a little girl. Which happened…never. thanks:)

Am I the only one confused by the last three posts?

Also, Awesome Job! I’ve been checking every day for a new one of these :)

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